I was looking at cards in the store today and (not being an overly romantic person) I found it difficult to find a card that conveyed my feelings without being totally sappy and over-the-top lovey-dovey. That got me wondering "what would I do if my relationship was on the rocks during this season?"
Let's think about the word "love" for a moment. What comes to mind when you hear that word? While Valentine's Day has historically been connected with eros or "romantic love", it doesn't have to be that way for you.
Think about when you were in elementary school (back when girls had cooties and boys were gross). Did you only send one to the teacher you had a crush on or did you send them to all your friends? Were you the one who showed agape love and sent one to everyone in the class?
If you aren't feeling the romance in your relationship, I invite you to redefine Valentine's Day as a Winter-time Thanksgiving (although I use the word Winter loosely as Houston is definitely not experiencing winter weather much lately). I challenge you to think of 5 events or experiences you have enjoyed sharing with your partner, 5 times you have felt loved by your partner, and 5 positive traits that your partner possesses. Traits are aspects of personality - we're not looking for "beautiful hair" on this list, we're looking for things like, "cares about doing tasks to the best of his ability" or "takes time to notice when someone is in need."
The feeling of being "in love" is built through small moments of feeling admired, cherished, and cared for by the other person. Try sharing your list with your partner. It doesn't have to be in a fancy card, the power is in sharing the list. Start rebuilding your habit of admiration and you just might find yourself back "in love".